Fleagles Explode for 4 TDs in 4-0 Shutout of Slurpy Slimeballs

 The Filthasmellfia Fleagles celebrated their largest scoring output of the UKBBL season with a dominant 4-0 shutout of the Slurpy Slimeballs nurgle squad. The Fleagles got 3 touchdowns from gutter runner DeVermin Sniff, while A.J. Brownrat chipped in the fourth. Most surprisingly perhaps, the team was able to hold its own blocking against the much stronger squad, only suffering 4 injuries and knocking out stand-out rotspawn Burth “the Tick,” even with rat ogre Ani-Mal Dankrat sitting out the game with a bruised tail.

Brownrat scores the Fleagles 4th TD of the game 

“This is what this team can do when things are going right,” said Fleagles Coach Nickon Spearinme after the match. “When the rats are picking up the ball and dodging like that, they can really fill up the scoreboard. Of course, when they’re not, they can really fill up the casualty box.”

Despite the one-sided final score, the game began dangerously for the Fleagles, as a brilliant defensive maneuver by the Slimeballs nearly led to a turnover. After thrower Skenny Snickett grabbed the opening kick, he settled back in the pocket deep in Filthasmellfia territory, and his gutter runners flared out toward the sidelines waiting for the Slimeballs slow-moving bloaters and rotspawn Burth to move forward.

The Slimeballs, however, held their ground, and as the clock ticked down to the midpoint of the half, Filthasmellfia was forced to move forward. Surrounded by blockers and with Brownrat nearby ready to take a hand off, Snickett moved toward midfield, as two more gutter runners spread wide ready to go up field on pass routes.

Once Snicket and his blockers were in striking distance, Burth and two of the Slimeballs bloaters trundled forward. As one bloater took down a blocker by slamming his open-sore-covered belly into the line-rat’s snout, Burth slithered into the opening and began threatening Snickett with his tentacles. The skaven thrower turned to hand the ball to Brownrat, who was unmarked and could easily escape up field. But something was clearly wrong.

Instead of reaching out his hands to take the ball, Brownrat stared at Burth’s swirling tentacles and the puss weeping from the many open sores on the two bloaters. Frozen with disgust and repulsion, the wide-eyed gutter runner merely muttered, “the horror” over and over again.

Snickett looks for help from other players, as it’s clear Brownrat is not going to be able to take the hand off and Burth’s tentacles threaten to make dodging away impossible.

“Yeah, that one’s on me,” said Coach Spearinme. “I know their ‘disturbing  presence’ is one of the main ways these nurgle fellas play defense, but I thought skaven were immune. I mean, look at these rats. How do they kiss their little rodent kids goodnight at the end of the day if they can be disturbed by someone’s appearance?”

Shrewdly recognizing that the hand-off was a bad idea—and that trying to dodge away from Burth’s tentacles was an even worse idea—Snickett quickly called an audible and waved over linerat Jake Smelliot and blitzer Bratdon Grime.  In a risky maneuver, they crowded around Burth and the bloaters so they could put together a chain-push, blocking a bloater into Snicket into to push him away from Burth.

After breaking free, Snickett was able to escape the pocket and hand the ball to DeVermin Sniff, who raced along the western sideline into Slimeball territory. With the clock ticking down, the only chance for a score was for Sniff to put his snout down and sprint up the sideline, dodging a Slimeballs’ rotter lineman and pestigor along the way.

“That was some real skaven BS right there,” said Spearinme proudly during the postgame press conference. As the scribes chuckled and Spearinme looked confused, they then asked him if he knew what BS stood for. “Of course, I do,” the confident coach said. “BS stands for ‘bold strategy.’”

DeVermin Sniff dodges a pestigor’s would-be tackle on his way toward an unlikely TD

The Fleagles’ ‘bold strategy’ only grew bolder and continued to pay-off in the second half. Kicking deep, the Fleagles repeatedly charged up-field to try to cut-off the ball carrier from his blockers. A failed hand-off here, a failed pick-up there, and a fireball from the wizard the Fleagles hired for the match all paid off, leading to 3 scoop-and-score touchdowns for Sniff and for Brownrat.

As if that weren’t ‘bold’ enough, one drive even included Smelliot knocking out Burth when the hulking rotspawn fell on him after a particularly violent block. As the two flopped about on the pitch, apparently one of Burth’s own tentacles wrapped around his throat cutting off his oxygen until he lost consciousness.

“When you score four touchdowns and a skaven linerat knocks out a rotspawn, you know you you’re doing something right,” said Coach Spearinme. “I just wish I knew what it was so I could do it every time we take the field.”